How to Convince Someone to Go to Therapy?

Determining the right way in regard to how to convince someone to go to therapy, especially when they’re clearly struggling but won’t accept help or have misgivings about therapy that are getting in the way of them seeking out help, is a challenging task, but not an impossible one. In this article, we will discuss how to have such a sensitive conversation with someone about the need for them to go to therapy in a way that is compassionate and respectful, from choosing the right time for the conversation to addressing misconceptions and fears about therapy to helping them find their own therapist and knowing when it may be time to take a step back.

How to Tell a Friend They Need Therapy

It can be difficult to know how to tell someone they need therapy, but following these steps can be a helpful tool for starting the conversation:

Choose the Right Time — There will never be a perfect time to have this conversation, but it’s important not to ambush your friend. Pick a time when you are both available for an extended period and choose a safe space where you can speak privately so that they can feel as comfortable as possible.
Frame the Conversation with Care — Make it clear that you are having this conversation from a place of care and concern rather than judgement. Focus on your worries for your friend instead of how their actions may be affecting you. Show them that you’re there for them.
Discuss the Changes in Their Behaviour — Openly discussing the changes you have noticed in your friend’s behaviour can be a great starting point. When doing so, make sure to use phrases like “I’ve noticed that…” instead of absolutes like “You are…” This will help in maintaining a sense of care as opposed to making them feel judged.
Actively Listen — Active listening means being completely present in the moment and shows your friend that you are making an effort to try to understand where they’re coming from. Give verbal and non-verbal cues that you are paying attention to them, such as repeating back or paraphrasing what you hear and nodding to demonstrate your understanding.
Share Your Own Experiences — First-hand accounts of what therapy is like and how it can help is a great way to get someone to be more at ease with the idea, so if you’ve been to therapy and it’s had a positive influence on you, share your experiences. Stories can go a long way in destigmatizing therapy and making it seem like a normal and natural option.

Addressing Misconceptions and Fears About Therapy

Common misconceptions and fears about therapy include that it is too expensive, talking to friends is better than talking to a stranger, and that their problem isn’t serious enough for therapy or, conversely, it would be too painful to talk about. Before telling someone they need therapy, do some research and prepare responses to effectively address the concerns that they may bring up. For example, in response to “therapy costs too much,” you can explain that if they are employed, their work benefits may cover part of the cost. There are also government subsidized mental health resources that they can look into, though these vary depending on the province or territory you are located in.

Regarding the possible fears surrounding talking to a therapist, such as “It’d be weird talking to a stranger about this,” try to explain that a therapist can provide a new perspective on their problems, offering support and coping mechanisms that you as their friend may not be able to, which would help them more in the long run. In reference to the idea that “It’s going to be too painful,” while of course you should be empathetic, don’t be afraid to point out that they are already in pain and avoiding the necessary help can make the pain worse. Tell them that talking to a therapist may seem painful at first, but it can also be a relief to get things off their chest.

They may also be concerned with long-term therapy, saying that “It takes too long to work.” Let your friend know that they don’t have to commit to a lifetime of therapy. Instead, ask if they’d be willing to try just once and go from there.

How to Help Your Loved One Find a Therapist

In figuring out how to get someone to go to therapy, if they seem open to the idea, offer to help them find the right therapist to fit their needs. The logistics of finding a therapist can often be overwhelming and challenging, but this can make the process easier and allow your loved one to feel more supported.

A great mental health source to check out or refer your friend to is Psychology Today. Through their website, there are a great deal of resources for a wide variety of needs and they can even help you find a therapist or treatment centre near you.

Know When It’s Time to Take a Step Back

Ultimately, your loved one could refuse to go to therapy, deciding that it’s not the right thing for them. If this is the case, you have to know when to stop pushing.

As much as you want to help someone through a difficult time, there is a limit to what you can do. You can’t force them to go to therapy and get mental health support, it’s not your decision, but you can emphasise the fact that you are there for them and make sure to remain a supportive and compassionate person in their life.

Be patient and give them time to process. Keep checking in with them and eventually they may be ready to get the help they need, but never force the issue.

Final Thoughts

When it comes to how to encourage someone to go to therapy, there are some steps you can follow:

Choose the right time
Frame the conversation with care rather than judgement
Discuss any changes in behaviour you have noticed
Actively listen and show them you are on their side
Share your own experiences with therapy if you have any
Address their fears and misconceptions about therapy
Help them find a therapist
Know when it is time to stop

Whether your loved one is having a hard time dealing with anxiety or struggling in a relationship, we here at Positive Mind Wellness offer a wide range of services that could work for them. Our experienced team of licensed healthcare professionals is dedicated to supporting your mental and emotional wellbeing. Contact us today.